The Littlest Things That Take You There.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Reasons to be happy (:

Here to update some non-chinese non-emo post. Nothing much about today. Went to Pioneer Mall macs with Wenyi to do some homework. Only did some econs and GP reading.. Then I went to Sakura to eat with my family!

Didn't take any pictures, because I was too busy eating lol. I was the last one to stop eating, what a surprise! Now my parents will finally believe that I have a hugeass stomach, as quoted by Wenyi.

Feeling troubled by PW, and lots of other homework to worry about. I don't have much to post about today, so will put up some long-overdue photos.

LOL read the letters on the butterfly's wings.

Kuku fron studying, Wenyi dragged me to hell.

令我生命悲惨的理由 (click to enlarge)

Why is my face looking bigger and fatter -.-

fp says: Before studying - normal.

After studying - cock-eyed. Hahaha.

Out with fp tmr! :D And then school starts alll over again. I have yet to do my chem bonding assignment :o Aiya who cares.

[edit]
Found this on Yunrou's blog and it's quite amusing haha.

Dear (someone you with whom you have recently spoken),
I don't really know how to tell you this, (1). I think I realized it (2) (3) and I saw you (4)(5) . I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8), but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and that (11).

(12),
Your name

1) What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - I’m joining the Convent
Black - Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're mean
Other - I dislike your eyelashes

2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forrest Grump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on peanut butter
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - When you put cuffs on me
July – When you smacked my ass
August - When I saw the purple monkey
September - Last year when you peed in your pants
October - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I finally changed my underwear

3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Lasagna- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Chicken - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
Fish - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over

5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadian’s goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 CD
Pink – Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection
None – My prized statue of Michael Jackson in the nude
Other --The elephant in the corner

6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes - Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons - Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Sexy
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat - shamed

7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we’re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
Silly - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks

8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your Hannah Montana underwear

9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - My virginity
C/D - Your photo with the moustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbour’s dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your suicide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards

10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Hate your cooking
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Will tell the authorities that you did not steal that whale in the back yard
M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
O/P - Was interviewed about the car you stole
Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs
S/T - Get sick when I think of your feet
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Haven’t showered in a month
Y/Z – am better off without you

11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Soda – I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – I'm scratching my ass as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war
Mineral water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked
Hot chocolate – Your cucumber fetishism is weird
Whiskey - I love Oprah Winfrey
Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine
Other – you should stop picking your nose

12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Warm tingly sensations
Australia - Best of luck on the sex change
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don’t hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Greetings to your frog
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself

Dear X,

I don't really know how to tell you this, I'm in love with your cat. I think I realized it when I threw up in your sock drawer outside of your office and I saw you sit on my illegitimate child in Ghana . I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand that you need a sex-change. I'm returning your car, but I'll keep your collection of butterflies as a memory. You should also know that I never will forget that night and that I'm off to lead a new life as a lemon.

Go drown yourself,
Your name.

[/edit]

Goodnight my friends!

so come on, tell me.
11:06 PM

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Overwhelming

今天天空有点灰...

想东想西也想不出一个所以然来, 我是不是不该再想了呢?

有没有人可以告诉我, 为什么有人明明就知道他对你不好, 却还是那么愿意, 那么不顾一切, 回到他身边. 那样苦苦的等待, 希望等到有一天, 他终于会明白自己一直在忽略什么, 错过什么.

有些人等着等着, 突然问自己为什么在这样傻傻的等. 最后还是决定放手. 在爱到心灰意冷, 毫无保留后. 有些人觉得这样等着也是一种幸福, 所以一直这样等等等...

那么辛苦, 自己内心不停挣扎. 感情和理智不停打着仗, 最后不只两败俱伤, 而且什么结果都没有. 终有一天, 你再也按奈不住内心那越来越大的空洞, 你决定再回到他身边. 对于周围的人的想法充耳不闻, 自己选择对他的不好视而不见. 这样是最好的吗, 是你真的想要得吗?

虽然你大概不会读到, 读到也不会知道我就在说你, 但我还是要说. 如果你是真的希望她会回来你的身边, 请你好好对待她. 没有行动的言语什么意义都没有. 她是你心爱的人, 不是仇恨的对象. 如果有一天真的让她等到你懂得珍惜她的时候, 我不会多说一句.

又是在想, 是不是如果当初她就像其他女孩子一样, 那么的需要呵护, 和形影不离的那种爱, 她就会得到比现在更多的幸福和快乐. 更多的关注, 更多的疼惜. 是不是因为每个人眼中的她总是那么坚强, 才让他们觉得她没有别人更需要那份温柔? 是不是真的需要到这种地步, 到他们需要求她留下来的时候, 才会相信其实她跟别人没有什么不同. 就只是一个爱逞强, 伤心只给自己懂的女人.

是不是要到她的心都冻结成一块冰, 你们才会懂.

----

First day back at school was hectic, and to say the least, overwhelming.

It isn't just about the overwhelming speed at which Mr Sean Tan goes through the lecture on Ionic Equilibria (the value is 1.00 times 10 to -14), it isn't just about Ms Lee telling us to have econs tutorial 5 section B done by tmr before it was even 8 in the morning... It isn't just that the amount of homework we got today was.... More than the lines my scheduler can contain. More than the smount of homework I would get in abut 3 days in the past.

It isn't even about Arab-Israeli conflict in the middle-east! Which was the only lesson that made me lose concentration.

Then, I don't knw what is it about. Maybe it's because during econs lecture our new GP teacher passed down sets of readings which are quite thick and in quite fine print, one set to be read by tmr GP lesson. Maybe it's because I knew that our chem SPA is in week 7 and promos are in week 10. Maybe it's because our PW teacher changed!!!

Omfg, heaven did us justice finally!

Oh yeah, maybe it's because people think that my flu virus will slap bang itself on the invisible barrier one seat next to me and will be unable to affect anyone out of that perimeter....

Anyw, I really did do my homework before I come online today la. Just that I only knw how to do about half of my econs tutorial, and the readings I'm only through with about 3 pages before I started to nod off. And I am not planning to do my chem eportfolio assignment lo... This day's been really mentally exhausting. Haix....

Anyw I finally bought my new uniform to replace one of the yellowish and non-elastic hemline one. Happy, but so tired. I wished time would allow me a few more hours for sleep tonight.

Hang in there.

so come on, tell me.
10:20 PM

Monday, July 6, 2009

Determinations

School's beginning all over again tmr. These past 4 days had felt like the holidays were here again, and minus the studying for MYEs. Didn't do much, other than re-reading my chinese novels, and just lagging around, or going out for a spin. Mundane days like this didn't feel that bad after all.

I wonder whether things are going to be the same when the new school term begins again. At the thought of lab lesson and PW tmr, got kind of turned off. There's still history, which by no means makes things any easier, if not harder. But I promised myself I got to try harder this time. And for a start, maybe I need to get a few more hours of sleep every night too. For the good of my focus in class and my growing eyebags ._.

Need. To. Get. Better.
I knw I keep saying this but I have no actions. But I am all set for change. I've got everyth I need, maybe except my heart. Need to get it back, hopefully the lessons tmr can capture it for me. I really, really wish that things will change this time. And of course, I'm not leaving things at just wishing. I will try my best to do it.

It might help if some people can ask me if I've done my homework/revision when they see me online at night. Okay, not your responsibility. It's mine. Okay, I knw.

THINGS WILL GET BETTER!!! RIGHT?
I need to show some people who thinks I'm no looks and no brains that I do have something other than air up there in the space between my ears. I am so desperate to prove my worth. So fucking desperate to see I am not a useless piece of shit. I will become better right? I will work harder and do better, right???

In. Your. Face.
Please wait patiently. Because I will do it. I really want myself to do it. And really really try.
Please wait for me. Because I will catch up with you. Please wait for me.

We will see tmr.

so come on, tell me.
11:08 PM

是不是虽然知道他对你其实不算好
也不舍得离开他...

so come on, tell me.
1:13 AM

Sunday, July 5, 2009

心碎的声音

最近好像是心碎的季节...
突然, 好多人都陷入一片心碎的黑洞...

心为什么会碎, 是不是因为付出了太多, 却什么也换不回来?
是不是因为经过一段刻骨铭心的爱情, 最后却还是回到原点?
是不是因为对方根本没有你想象中那样爱你, 突然才觉得自己好傻, 好傻..

经过一番挣扎才下定决心做的了断, 是不是会比较难过? 还是应该觉得解脱?
当一切过了, 你会不会想自己到底为什么陷在爱里, 出不来, 只是越陷越深..

当你付出所有一切去爱, 爱到失去自我时, 却突然要你回到原点
在他还没出现的生活, 回到只有自己的过去
要怎么习惯, 怎么适应?

虽然说一定会好过来, 但当寂寞来袭, 心里空虚无力时, 又该怎么过?
要用时间来麻痹伤口, 还真是需要毅力..

等待痊愈的间中　大家都要坚强
心碎的声音　不要再听到

----

Am feeling quite...low. No, I am fine. It's with all that's going on around me.

Thought about some things. So sick of me and my imperfections. I want to be like so and so, so and so. I want to have so and so's blah.. It's sick. And I also realised that I am a very superficial person. Not in the way I act. But in my thinking maybe?

Maybe the world really only likes pretty people, rich people, smart people. It's practical and realistic after all. Who bothers about the character? Anyw, I don't have a nice character either, so no point. And so I don't belong to either of the three types.

I can't change how I look, no I won't go for plastic surgery though I always talk about liposuction, I might be able to become smarter, if I study hard enough. And the wealth will come in after I get my job, I hope.

Does it really matter? You ask. Yes, it does. To me it does. So I am a very superficial person, so tell me you don't want to look nice, you don't want to have people like you, you don't want to be able to afford every single thing you like, you don't like to beat everyone at everyth.

I want to be more than just average.
I want to be everyth I can't be right now.

虽然心碎的人不是我..

so come on, tell me.
11:14 PM

Saturday, July 4, 2009

So, exams are over. And math paper was.... Like I expected. 2.5 hours of time wasting becasuse I literally only knw how to do like 2 out of 12 questions. So, U grade again.

Didn't update yesterday because I was addicted to playing Facebook games. Yeah, I'm lag la, I only go on to accept friend requests previously. So anyw, I hate my laggy comp because it always causes my death in almsot all the games on fb. What the shit. Zzz.

It's a lonely weekend man. Time for some tidying up of my messy notes and files after the exams. After I sort everyth out then I'll have the mood to start mugging for EOYs. I'm not even kidding. And even after I mug so long, I might not even do well.

Beats me why I bother. But still!

Goodnight.

so come on, tell me.
2:08 AM

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

FML

Ah, I am finally back online. Well, there's still math to go tmr before liberation but.. Don't start with me on that because I don't want to hear a single word more about it!

My life is so abso-fucking-lutely gone because I think I just flunked my econs and chem and history, which was no surprise. And don't ask me why I refuse to go and study math. It's probably because the last time I aced math was in PSLE, and that doesn't even count.

What is the point of me going there sitting down in a corner reading through the notes and practising questions when I already knw what it's gna be like tmr la. It will just be 2.5 hours of time wasting. There is just no point trying to cram 5 months worth of math in my head in like, 2 hours or so.

I might as well just not turn up and get a voided exam result. Feel like swearing man.
Fuck my fucking miserable life.

Promos? We'll see..

so come on, tell me.
8:03 PM